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roast swan and ginger beer

This is frigging hilarious. Whether you've heard of the Archers or not, if you've read a word of Enid Blyton, this should amuse you greatly.

"Gosh! I'm hungry as a hunter!" exclaimed David as he towelled himself dry afterwards. "I hope Aunt Jenny's put on a good spread for supper!" Aunt Jenny's table was spread with a snowy white cloth, and groaned beneath all the good things their cook, Mrs. Grundy, had made. The was a roast swan each, a meat pie, a saddle of mutton, hard-boiled eggs, heavenly tomatoes, crusty new bread, pots of jam, a whole wedding cake, and lashings of ginger beer.


And, my favourite:

Poor Mrs. Grundy threw her apron over her head and burst into tears. "This is your fault!" cried Denny, flying into a passion. "You know you should have been sleeping outside my door all night - I'll have Father whip you for this!"


Hee!

Comments

( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
cangetmad
Nov. 14th, 2003 12:51 pm (UTC)
"I'll have Father whip you for this!"
"Oh, well, 'twill turn the tables" blurted Mrs. Grundy through her tears.

That is genius. Love it.
stellanova
Nov. 14th, 2003 02:17 pm (UTC)
The whole thing is inspired- it's one of the funniest Blyton piss-takes I've ever read. Everything is perfect - I loved this:

"Arro-gant-toffs, arro-gant-toffs", the train seemed to say as it rattled along the tracks, "we're going on our holidays".

Genius indeed!
( 2 comments — Leave a comment )

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