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It's after two in the morning and I am posting on LJ. Why I am awake and driven to the internet at such an hour? Because my horrible little neighbours are having yet another gang bang - I'm sorry, party - next door. Yes, much as we love listening to the sounds of underage frolicking, sometimes, like when you want to get to sleep at two in the morning when you come home after your own relatively civilised night out (fabulous Chinese food in Jade with a bunch of friends followed by a couple of drinks), you just want them to shut the fuck up. What the hell is wrong with their father (their mother doesn't live there)? What sort of negligent arsehole goes off with his speedboat (oh yeah) and leaves his teenage daughters on their own every second weekend leaving his house free for any kid in a ten mile radius to have such noisy sexual congress in the back garden that it's audible over their truly terrible music choices? He's a shitty parent and he has horrible children. And they all, father and children alike, have the musical taste of boring and stupid middle-aged men; if I hear another crappy AOR/MOR track coming through the wall I'm going to set their fucking house on fire. I'm just saying.


( 10 comments — Leave a comment )
Apr. 2nd, 2006 02:26 am (UTC)
That sounds awful (literally and otherwise, I'm sure). I'm tempted to tell you to fight back with some really loud music they'd HATE, but that would just escalate, I'm afraid.

I don't suppose you can speak to the father at some point when the big idiot is home and tell him that he needs to have his daughters keep it down in future? That doesn't help you any tonight, of course, but perhaps he needs to realize that a) his daughters are being inconsiderate little bitches, and b) that people do notice that he's not there to supervise.

I don't suppose you've got a slingshot and a dozen eggs? A couple of well placed eggs lobbed in the middle of someone's sexual interlude should make them at least head inside. I am kidding, I think. Unless you've got a good throwing arm...
Apr. 2nd, 2006 10:44 am (UTC)
Hee! Egg-chucking is awfully tempting....

Seriously, though, I think we're going to go in to the dad this week. I do feel sorry for the kids, because wild as they are, they wouldn't get a chance to do any of it if their father actually stayed at home at the weekend. Of course, he doesn't seem to make sure that they actually, like, go to school, so it's not like he's much cop during the week either. But yeah, maybe if we came in it'd embarrass him into saying something to them. Of course, he could just get defensive and all "my little angels are perfect!" We'll see...
Apr. 2nd, 2006 03:31 am (UTC)
You wrote, "What sort of negligent arsehole goes off with his speedboat (oh yeah) and leaves his teenage daughters on their own every second weekend leaving his house free for any kid in a ten mile radius to have such noisy sexual congress in the back garden..."

Do what I did...TAPE it and let him listen to it. He may be in denial about what his darling virginal (gag) daughters are up to in his absence. Don't forget to send a copy of the tape to the "mother" too...if she is still around. Or you could invite all your friends and neighbors over in the middle of the night the next time he goes away so everyone can "listen to" the fun and then loudly complain to the father when he gets back...that, or shame the little tarts into keeping the volume down.

And you may wish to remind him that if his daughters are truly underage and being left without supervision, he may be legally liable for whatever mischief they (and their friends) get up to (including under age drinking and then possibly driving)....so he may wish to check with his insurance to see what the worse case scenario may be (his bi-weekly jaunts may be leaving him extremely financially vulnerable...as in sued up his wazoo if someone dies or is seriously injured on his property).
Apr. 2nd, 2006 07:01 am (UTC)
Call the guards. It's a breach of several laws on behaviour at that hour of the night. They'll soon let the parents know what's going on.
Apr. 2nd, 2006 10:10 am (UTC)
You'd think so, but sadly they don't let the parents know, because we and other neighbours have called the guards several times in the past (including last night!).
Apr. 2nd, 2006 08:52 am (UTC)
Oh shit, I'm sorry Anna, there is absolutely nothing worse than obnoxiously inconsiderate neighbours in the middle of the night.

Can you tell the father what happens when he goes away? And say that next time you're calling the police?

I hope you got to sleep eventually! x
Apr. 2nd, 2006 10:54 am (UTC)
I did! And was up in time to listen to the Archers omnibus this morning.

We did call the police last night, but they didn't do anything. We're going to call in to the dad this week - perhaps embarrassment that all his neighbours know about his kids making a show of themselves will cause him to curb their antics...
Apr. 2nd, 2006 11:31 am (UTC)
Aaargh. Last night our neighbours two doors down were having a loud party in the garden, which was not audible from our bedroom but was sadly ideally placed to wake Gnome at one-and-a-half hour intervals. They shut up some time between her waking at 3.15 and getting up for the day at 4.55. I am half dead. I hope you are not half dead.
Apr. 2nd, 2006 12:14 pm (UTC)
Awwww, poor you and sleepy Gnome. I am not actually half-dead, because at least I got to sleep in until the Archers omnibus, so really I should count my blessings. Boo to stupid noisy inconsiderate neighbours!
Apr. 2nd, 2006 02:29 pm (UTC)
I think taping the little monsters is an excellent idea. Even better with video.
( 10 comments — Leave a comment )


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