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It's after two in the morning and I am posting on LJ. Why I am awake and driven to the internet at such an hour? Because my horrible little neighbours are having yet another gang bang - I'm sorry, party - next door. Yes, much as we love listening to the sounds of underage frolicking, sometimes, like when you want to get to sleep at two in the morning when you come home after your own relatively civilised night out (fabulous Chinese food in Jade with a bunch of friends followed by a couple of drinks), you just want them to shut the fuck up. What the hell is wrong with their father (their mother doesn't live there)? What sort of negligent arsehole goes off with his speedboat (oh yeah) and leaves his teenage daughters on their own every second weekend leaving his house free for any kid in a ten mile radius to have such noisy sexual congress in the back garden that it's audible over their truly terrible music choices? He's a shitty parent and he has horrible children. And they all, father and children alike, have the musical taste of boring and stupid middle-aged men; if I hear another crappy AOR/MOR track coming through the wall I'm going to set their fucking house on fire. I'm just saying.

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eternalrevenge
Apr. 2nd, 2006 03:31 am (UTC)
reply
You wrote, "What sort of negligent arsehole goes off with his speedboat (oh yeah) and leaves his teenage daughters on their own every second weekend leaving his house free for any kid in a ten mile radius to have such noisy sexual congress in the back garden..."

Do what I did...TAPE it and let him listen to it. He may be in denial about what his darling virginal (gag) daughters are up to in his absence. Don't forget to send a copy of the tape to the "mother" too...if she is still around. Or you could invite all your friends and neighbors over in the middle of the night the next time he goes away so everyone can "listen to" the fun and then loudly complain to the father when he gets back...that, or shame the little tarts into keeping the volume down.

And you may wish to remind him that if his daughters are truly underage and being left without supervision, he may be legally liable for whatever mischief they (and their friends) get up to (including under age drinking and then possibly driving)....so he may wish to check with his insurance to see what the worse case scenario may be (his bi-weekly jaunts may be leaving him extremely financially vulnerable...as in sued up his wazoo if someone dies or is seriously injured on his property).

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